D.A.N.I.E.L.

Dear Diary,

I’ve been thinking.

The other day I wrote in my notebook:

“I think I’m ready to give love a chance, but at the same time I can’t help but wonder if love is ready to give me a chance.”

I could go out there and charm the world. But even if I would it’s not entirely up to me, and that is the problem. People don’t really notice me, and the only females that really like me are little baby girls and old ladies. I can charm the pants off the old ladies, the oldies really like me and it’s scary.

I know I’m not the alpha male that can slay any beast, plunder any village and come back as a hero and claim the right to the alpha female and have lots of gorgeous little alpha kids and have the most alpha family ever. I know I’m not perfect, in fact I’m very flawed and I’d be the first to admit it. But I also know myself enough to know that there are plenty of great qualities about me that the ladies would like. When I try to fool myself on those cold, lonely nights in that empty old bed thinking I’m a lousy person and nobody will ever like me somewhere inside there whispers a voice, and that voice says that I’m a good man, I’d be a good comrade, mate and life partner for whoever grabs me.

I laughed my head off one night while I was thinking about stuff like this, and I had a funny idea I would really like to try out. I thought I should have to send in one of those personal ads in the newspapers where people are looking for… well, whatever it is they are looking for; erotic adventures or just a date over a cup of coffee. My ad would say something like this:

“Chubby guy in his prime, film-director-to-be, future Oscar winner and Hollywood’s next Golden Boy is looking for an independent, dark, and mysterious Evil Queen with strong opinions to have and to rule with for a lifetime.”

That, I think, would be a success. So, there you have it, ladies. Grab me while you can.

Oh, before I forget. I stumbled over this really ridiculous test where you enter your name and it will give you your “Sexy Name”. I got a pretty good one, don’t you agree?

Get Your Sexy Name

Technorati Tags: Life, Love, Personal

I Don’t Like That

Dear diary,

Even though a lot is great right now, and I’m really trying my hardest to stay positive and happy to the best of my ability I’ve still felt like crap for the past few days.

I don’t feel appreciated. I don’t like that. I feel lonely. I don’t like that. I feel frustrated. I don’t like that.

I think once everything is sorted out and work starts for real I will focus on nothing else… and just bury myself in it. Work, eat, sleep, work eat sleep, workeatsleep. Make money. Save money.

That’s all for now.

Technorati Tags: Dear Diary, Life, Personal, Thoughts

Dreams

The human is a dreaming being. Not only do we dream at night to keep us sane, but we dream during the day, too. We all have got them. We all do it.

We think about our life, about what we want to do, and what we wish we could do. We set goals and we try to achieve them. And sometimes we set goals so distant they melt into the horizon and we have to fight to get through the mist, then the storm, then the darkness, and maybe then the sun will rise and we will see it is possible to get to that Ultimate Goal, the Dream of all dreams.

I watched a making-of documentary a few nights ago. One thing a lady in this film said was something about how happy she was to be in this film, to be a part of her director’s dream. The director had worked on the story they were filming for 25 years, and it was not just another movie for him, it really was a labour of love, passion, and dedication to bring this story to life and tell the world about something very dear to him. (And let me just say that the result is amazing, it really shows how he wanted everything to be… well, if not perfect, then pretty darn close to perfection, and he did it!)

Like everybody else I have set goals for myself, and I even have a few dreams I’m working towards. Some of them might be ridiculous and perhaps even a bit of the delusions of grandeur side of life, but they are all very much achievable.

That lady’s statement in addition with what’s going on in my life right now equals an interesting thought. To be brutally honest this was something I had never even thought about before…

I have a new job, a new boss, new company, new truck, everything is new to me even though a lot of the job is still the same trucker’s job I’ve done before. I do not know how much of a dream it was for my boss to be starting his own trucking company. But the thought of being a part of somebody else’s dream is to me a source of joy. It really is.

I may be slow, I may be stupid but I never realized the greatness of being involved in making somebody else’s dream into reality until last Saturday. I guess the ultimate would be to be involved in somebody else’s goals and dreams while you are working to achieve yours.

Wait… that’s exactly what I am doing right now!

Technorati Tags: Dreams, Goals, Life, Personal